Monday, October 21, 2013

The Marriage Mission field (Part 1)

"And the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh." -Mark 10:8


There are some young girls who spend their days decorating their hair with yellow flowers (also known as weeds) and pretending to walk down an imaginary aisle (also known as a very crooked/uneven sidewalk), to their Prince Charming waiting on the other end (also known as...nothin but thin air...)
We call these the good ol' days. When every girl is somehow guaranteed they will end up with Prince Charming and their life together will be more than a fairy tale.
But then....life happens.

People walk out on us, dad's get busy and forget to nurture that side of their daughters that is practically crying out desperate for their attention, boys do "boy things" and break girls hearts-and they promise forever at 17 but by 17 and a half they just don't think you're as pretty as you once were.

And this...and worse...happens over and over and over sometimes.
For years.

So you do what any girl in there right mind does-you just stop. Stop trying to win that boy's heart, because you know they won't keep yours like the rest of them didn't. Stop trusting that other one who promises to be different, because you know they never are. Stop letting your guard down, because frankly you're just tired of being hurt over and over and over again.
At the end of the day you'd rather be alone than broken.
And I get that. I've been there.

But then God does something totally new, and you know He's asking you to trust Him and to allow Him to protect you instead of the walls you've put up yourself. And it's scary. You've grown accustomed to those walls. You've probably even decorated them if you're like me.

For the Mr. and I our dating period was brief but fun. I had managed to let him in just enough to call him my boyfriend, but deep inside I think I knew I would never let him in all the way-because that was something I did not want to do with anyone ever.
So you can imagine my surprise when 3 months later he asked me to marry him. Don't get me wrong-I was beside myself with giddy. But late that night when all I could do was go back and forth between staring at the new ring on my finger and the ceiling, I started thinking.
Marriage, huh. That was probably going to require me to let every single wall down. Straight down to the foundation. Talk about out of my comfort zone. Plus-I still lived at home with my parents-and at risk of sounding like a silly 5 year old, I liked it. My mom is my best friend and we stayed up late talking almost every night. How was that going to work?? Let alone the fact that I couldn't figure out how I was going to be able to jump out of bed and put on my make-up every morning and jump back in bed before that darling husband of mine woke up and saw me without mascara. Within 24 hours of weeping with joy at the proposal of my dreams by the man of my dreams and celebrating all day long, Satan had already managed to remind me....

There was no way I could ever do this marriage thing.

Part 2 continued next Monday....

Linking up with: Kendra, Nan

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