Monday, July 15, 2013

"Crave" Week 2

Welcome to Week 2 of "Crave"! How's it going for you? What's God showing? I can honestly tell you that on the days I've missed reading some of the book, are the days that I have seemed to struggle more with my eating choices. This week we're covering Chapters 1 & 2. Make sure you also stop by Crystal & Rebecca's sites to see what God showed them this week. Also, link up what you're thinking as well-I love seeing everyone's perspectives!!!

Chapter 1: "What's Really Going On Here?"

I love Lysa's opening example of the commercial with the orange monster chasing the woman around, and how that's so often ourselves. It was such an eye-opening reality of the truth of the situation that I live through seemingly day after day at times. Once in a while when I let that "orange monster" catch up with me and let myself slip one time because of lack of time or convenience sake and I end up calling it a free day, because I did already slip up earlier in the day. Well then that day becomes that week. And often times I'll find myself month sounds good! Next month I will wake up with resolve and determination and will kick this for good.

"We crave what we eat. So, the cycle continues day after day. (19)

After day after day after month after year. Which can leave me feel defeated and helpless, like this is just who I am and who I will be my entire life. But then Lysa is so quick to remind us that...

I believe God made us to crave. Now before you think this is some sort of cruel joke by God, let me assure you that the object of our craving was never supposed to be food or other things people find themselves consumed by, such as sex or money or chasing after significance. Yes, we were made to crave-long for, want greatly, desire eagerly and beg for-God. Only God. But Satan wants to do everything possible to replace our craving for God with something else. (21)

And all of a sudden, just like that, I'm reminded that I am not helpless, nor defeated. Those feelings are evidence of Satan's attempts in my life to keep me down. Because let's face it-if I see something as impossible, am I really going to go for it? No. Example: I've never jumped off a tall building because I know it's impossible to fly. It's the same with this, if Satan can convince us that we are stuck in our circumstances and defeated before we even try in our battle with food, then he's already won half the battle-and for me it's a HUGE half of the battle.

Chapter 2: "Replacing My Cravings"

I closed Chapter 1 feeling like maybe there was hope, like maybe my feelings of constant defeat were just that, feelings. Feelings that had been lying to me and that I had been believing for far too long. But I what? Now that I recognize Satan's attempts to fill my head with lies and convince me that I was helpless because this was just "the way I am", what do I do?

Well first of all, when cracking open Chapter 2 I smiled to myself reading about Lysa's resolve to do better the next day and really live it up until then on the cinnamon rolls. I have made myself so, so sick doing that as well.

The day I read this chapter I had been trying-feebly- to edge in to this eating healthy attempt for one week. That morning I eagerly hopped on the scale to check out the progress I was sure I had made, after all, it had been a whole week ya'll. I was quickly disappointed when I saw that I had actually gained 2 ounces. Now that may sound silly. A.) It wasn't even a pound, it was 2 ounces. B.) When I said feeble attempt, I meant feeble attempt. I had in no way given it my all, and hardly worked out at all that week. So how I was expecting such grand results is beyond me. But still, I slumped on the couch to read this chapter of the book, but in the back of my mind I was already planning the extravagant food ways I would "comfort" myself throughout the day to help ease the blow from the scale. So when I read this, I'm obviously now in full-on waterworks...

"This wasn't really about the scale or what clothing size I was; it was about this battle that raged in my heart." (28)

After I dried my eyes enough to read the next sentence, I resolved to keep trying. To be honest with you, at that particular time because I was so upset I couldn't vow the whole day would be full of healthy eating and exercise. But I would at least make breakfast healthy. It was a step right? The rest of the day would unfold as it may. But you know what? I had a great healthy lunch, snacks, dinner, AND finally a workout that I could really feel was real. You know what I mean? That night as I laid in bed I thought over the day. I thought of the swing of the pendulum of emotions inside me. That I began the day feeling so defeated from that blow on the scale, and instantly turned to a plan of food, food, and more food throughout the day to comfort me. And instead felt amazing after a great eating and exercise day. That's something only God can do.

Lysa's transparency of sharing her examples of struggle and how she prayed to cope with them was inspiring to me at the end of this chapter. Every time she craved something she shouldn't, she would pray. An honest prayer that told her Father that she was really struggling in that moment. The result?

"Then, one morning it finally happened. I got up and for the first time in a long while, I felt incredibly empowered. I still did the same crazy routine with the scale-no clothes, no ponytail holder-but I only stepped on it once. The numbers hadn't changed yet, but my heart had. (31)

I love that. However, I will be honest with you-I'm not there yet. I'm still struggling a lot, and my heart isn't in the satisfied state that Lysa describes. But I do have hope, and faith, that if I continue to be faithful to Him in this area of my heart and my life, that eventually I will too. And that will keep me going.

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